Living Simply and Happily

Life isn’t perfect and it will never be. Sometimes it’s full of fun and good times, sometimes, it just sucks! But, the worst approach to life is living with discontent and unhappy thoughts all the time. Sure, we could complain about our neighbour’s dog, or tight clothing, or weeds in the yard. Certainly, there are times when our days are filled with a series of unfortunate events and we definitely give a damn at that. But, wouldn’t it be more unfortunate to live a life full of complaining? Does it even make a difference when we respond negatively to bad circumstances?

Why You Shouldn’t Respond Negatively To Predicaments

Okay, not reacting negatively doesn’t mean you have to deny emotions like pain, anger, resentment and the likes. Having negative initial reactions to bad circumstances is pretty normal. However, choosing to respond to problems negatively is unhealthy and will only result to more problems later on. Responding negatively to predicaments will:

• Nurture a negative attitude. Complaining will only lead to more misery and will never bring us joy. It will draw us more only on the negative aspect of that particular event, which disallows us to see the opportunity that comes with the problem.
• Negatively affect the people around us. Our habit of grumbling will bring everyone around us into the problem. They will either be influenced by our negative energy, or they may choose to avoid us in the fear of getting the negative vibe.
• Never change the circumstances anyway. Whatever happened is already in the past, although the consequences and the impact of that event may linger, responding negatively to it won’t change the circumstances.
• Take away the value of distress. The feeling of discomfort has a philosophical advantage in our lives. It gives life lessons and builds our character.
• Make us an unattractive person. People who love to complain about anything come as self-centred individuals, which is a very unattractive character trait.
• Encourage us to continually play the blame game. Blaming doesn’t bring any good; only more resentment. People who love to blame often find themselves having difficulty to embrace change.

Although complaining is normal, doing it most of the time is not. Instead, we can direct our energies into taking healthy measures to address the issue. The problem may remain the same, but the effects may not upset us as much as it does when we respond negatively. Also, when our attitude towards a problem is constructive, it directs us into a creative space that allows us to respond to problems positively.

How Do We Live Simply, and Happily with Minimal Complains?

1. Be open to change and embrace it when the need for it comes. Going through change may be difficult for many of us, but it is often needed. To respond to a problem effectively, we may need to consider other better ways that will require us to accept change.
2. Accept and recognize that we are living in an imperfect world. Acceptance of this reality is essential in putting things in perspective. This lessens our expectations from people and from life itself. It makes us aware of pain, trials and other adversities in life. It also makes us appreciate the good things in life.
3. Differentiate constructive criticism from complaint. The former puts light to the issue as subject of learning. It raises appropriate attention to the problem, not to blame anyone, but to bring awareness of the wrong committed, so that it won’t be done again. On the other hand, complaints are often done in low spirits and behind the back, without any objective of correcting mistakes.
4. Speak to the right audience. One worse thing you can do is grumble and complain about an issue in front of the wrong audience. This does not only encourage gossip, it also elicits more negative reactions. When talking about an issue, it is good to talk to someone or to people who can offer solutions.
5. Stop validating your self-worth by complaining. Sometimes we complain to try to impress others, or to communicate our importance. This is a childish act and will only cause people to avoid us.
6. Know your triggers. Perhaps you don’t complain all the time. Maybe, there are only times and occasions that trigger this attitude. Knowing your triggers make you become vigilant when the “complain radar” is starting to give signals.
7. Practice not complaining in stages. Don’t set a goal of “never complaining again” because it will just frustrate you when you do. Instead, designate a time when you should be mindful not to complain. You can try doing it a few hours a day, or a few days a week.